I have been told by my new psychiatrist that I suffer from 'emotional dysregulation'. Its an inability to modulate ones emotions. I always had but it makes a difference when someone actually has a name for it. I have read that its mostly a hallmark common in borderline disorders and early trauma based disorders, Complex PTSD and Dissociative disorders. Some say it starts in early in life and is related to attachment development when we relied on our primary care givers how to modulate our emotional responses. If those people were abusive, frightening or neglecting we fail to develop these skills.I find when I am upset or triggered about something it stays with me intensely and I cannot get back to a stable mood for a long time no matter what I do. Also when in the mood it seems it is forever and ever and was always like this way. I find it really difficult to remember feeling any other way so its hard to find comfort that it will eventually end as it seems endless. Even if I do acknowledge at some intellectual level a memory of being happier its like its was not my happiness its someone else's. That can make the whole episode even more prolonged. I have been in one the whole week and only now just comming back up. It was not because of anyone one else. I had got upset with myself on Sunday and it was like someone hit me with a 2x4. Now I am walking on eggshells with my self not to get over emotional about anything but that can lead to numbing out if I go too far. Does anyone else have these chronic problem with swinging emotions. I would love to hear some ones else's account of their struggles.
Emotional Dysregulation
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Posted - 10/08/2009 : 09:41:40
