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Administrator
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15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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| Administrator
Administrator
15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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 Posted - 12/06/2009 : 11:34:10
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WHAT ARE THE 10 GOLDEN RULES FOR LIVING A BETTER LIFE?
In the past 5,000 years of recorded history, there have been many "golden rules" for living a better life.
I would like to discuss 10 Golden Rules for living a better life that I have found helpful.
10 Golden Rules For Living A Better Life
- KINDNESS
Be kind, understanding and friendly.
- COOPERATION
Be cooperative, generous and humble.
- FORGIVENESS
Show forgiveness, trust, and gratitude.
- LEADERSHIP
Show moral leadership, peacemaking, and independence.
- PLANNING
Plan ahead; show caution; don't be impulsive, reckless or promiscuous.
- ORDER
Fight chaos. Live a life of stability, purpose, and beauty.
- MODERATION
Avoid excesses; keep work-love-play in balance; compromise; live within your means.
- COURAGE
Be self-confident, optimistic and persevere against adversity.
- JUSTICE
Be respectful, responsible and honest. Treat others the way you want others to treat you.
- WISDOM
Learn from your mistakes, admit when you are ignorant, keep questioning.
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Administrator
15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/06/2009 : 11:43:12
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GOLDEN RULE #1: KINDNESS
Be kind, understanding and friendly.
Today:
- Did I show compassion, kindness or affection?
- Was I sensitive to (and understand) other people’s feelings?
- Did I prefer to be with friends and enjoy their company?
For Example:
"It is easy to hate and it is difficult to love. This is how the whole scheme of things works. All good things are difficult to achieve; and bad things are very easy to get."
"Can there be a love which does not make demands on its object?"
"Consideration for others is the basic of a good life, a good society."
Confucius (551 B.C.E. – 479 B.C.E.).
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15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/06/2009 : 11:52:18
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GOLDEN RULE #2: COOPERATION
Be cooperative, generous and humble.
Today:
- Did I cooperate with others for a common purpose (and do a fair share of the work)?
- Did I unselfishly help others (without expecting personal gain)?
- Was I humble?
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15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/06/2009 : 11:56:08
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GOLDEN RULE #3: FORGIVENESS
Show forgiveness, trust, and gratitude.
Today:
- Did I forgive other peoples’ mistakes, and not bear a grudge or seek revenge?
- Did I trust people and not become overly suspicious?
- Was I thankful for the good things in life, and express thanks to others?
For Example:
"To be wronged is nothing unless you continue to remember it."
"Forget injuries, never forget kindnesses."
Confucius (551 B.C.E. – 479 B.C.E.).
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15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/06/2009 : 11:59:10
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GOLDEN RULE #4: LEADERSHIP
Show moral leadership, peacemaking, and independence.
Today:
- Did I lead others toward a postive goal (or away from temptation to do evil)?
- Did I skillfully prevent (or handle) conflict within a group or family?
- Did I not fear being alone?
For Example:
"The father who does not teach his son his duties is equally guilty with the son who neglects them."
"It is better to light one small candle than to curse the darkness."
"The superior man thinks always of virtue; the common man thinks of comfort."
Confucius (551 B.C.E. – 479 B.C.E.).
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15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/06/2009 : 12:05:11
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GOLDEN RULE #5: PLANNING
Plan ahead; show caution; don't be impulsive, reckless or promiscuous.
Today:
- Did I plan for tomorrow (and not live just for today)?
- Did I think carefully before acting or speaking?
- Did I ensure my impulsive or reckless behavior didn't harm anyone?
- Did I not have casual sex (with someone who was not my permanent sex partner)?
For Example:
"The cautious seldom err."
"Success depends upon previous preparation, and without such preparation there is sure to be failure."
"To see and listen to the wicked is already the beginning of wickedness."
Confucius (551 B.C.E. – 479 B.C.E.).
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15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/06/2009 : 12:08:46
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GOLDEN RULE #6: ORDER
Fight chaos. Live a life of stability, purpose, and beauty.
Today:- Was my mood stable and predictable?
- Was my social life stable and predictable?
- Did I have purpose and beauty in my life?
For Example:
"Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it."
Confucius (551 B.C.E. – 479 B.C.E.).
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15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/06/2009 : 12:13:18
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GOLDEN RULE #7: MODERATION
Avoid excesses; keep work-love-play in balance; compromise; live within your means.
Today:
- Did I avoid extremes or excesses, and show self-restraint?
- Did I maintain a proper balance between work, love and play?
- Was I able to compromise, and see merit in an opponent’s viewpoint?
- Did I live within my means?
For Example:
"When prosperity comes, do not use all of it."
"He who will not economize will have to agonize."
"Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated."
Confucius (551 B.C.E. – 479 B.C.E.).
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15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/06/2009 : 12:17:07
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GOLDEN RULE #8: COURAGE
Be self-confident, optimistic and persevere against adversity.
Today:
- Was I self-confident?
- Was I optimistic?
- Did I persevere against adversity?
For Example:
"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall."
"It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop."
Confucius (551 B.C.E. – 479 B.C.E.).
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15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/06/2009 : 12:19:57
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GOLDEN RULE #9: JUSTICE
Be respectful, responsible and honest.
Today:
- Did I treat others the way I wanted others to treat me?
- Was I ethical, respectful, responsible and honest?
- Did I heed correction or make amends (if warranted)?
For Example:
"What you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others."
"Recompense injury with justice, and recompense kindness with kindness."
"The object of the superior man is truth."
"The superior man understands what is right; the inferior man understands what will sell."
"Without feelings of respect, what is there to distinguish men from beasts?"
Confucius (551 B.C.E. – 479 B.C.E.).
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15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/06/2009 : 12:27:03
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GOLDEN RULE #10: WISDOM
Learn from your mistakes, admit when you are ignorant, keep questioning
Today:
- Did I learn from the past, live in the present, and plan for the future?
- Did I learn from my mistakes?
- Did I admit to my ignorance?
- Did I never stop questioning?
For Example:
None of us welcome bad news about ourselves and our work, but in order to gain wisdom, we must not only accept such feedback, but actively seek seek it out. Accepting feedback can be a spine-stiffening experience, especially when we hear things about ourselves that are not favorable. Yet, wise people acknowledge their shortcomings and resolve to make improvements.
"Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance."
"A fool despises good counsel, but a wise man takes it to heart."
"A man who has committed a mistake and doesn't correct it is committing another mistake."
"The essence of knowledge is, having it, to apply it; not having it, to confess your ignorance."
"Think no vice so small that you may commit it, and no virtue so small that you may over look it."
"Respect yourself and others will respect you."
"Study the past if you would define the future."
"If I am walking with two other men, each of them will serve as my teacher. I will pick out the good points of the one and imitate them, and the bad points of the other and correct them in myself."
"If you think in terms of a year, plant a seed; if in terms of ten years, plant trees; if in terms of 100 years, teach the people."
Confucius (551 B.C.E. – 479 B.C.E.).
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15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/06/2009 : 15:26:27
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SOCIOPATHS AND THE "10 GOLDEN RULES" FOR LIVING A BETTER LIFE
Throughout history, severe sociopaths have slaughtered millions of people (e.g., Hitler, Stalin, Mao Zedong).
How Would A Sociopath Score On The "10 Golden Rules"?
- Kindness.
Be kind, understanding and friendly.
(Sociopaths are incapable of love and empathy.)
- Cooperation.
Be cooperative, generous and humble.
(Sociopaths take much more than they give.)
- Forgiveness.
Show forgiveness, trust, and gratitude.
(Sociopaths lack forgiveness, trust, and gratitude.)
- Leadership.
Show moral leadership, peacemaking, and independence.
(Sociopaths lust after power and rebel against authority.)
- Planning.
Plan ahead; show caution; don't be impulsive, reckless or promiscuous.
(Sociopaths usually are impulsive and reckless. Their lack of caution ultimately is their undoing.)
- Order.
Fight chaos. Live a life of stability, purpose, and beauty.
(Sociopaths may have stability and purpose, but ultimately they cause chaos and destruction.)
- Moderation.
Avoid excesses; keep work-love-play in balance; compromise; live within your means.
(Sociopaths are attracted to a life of excess; seldom compromise; and live beyond their means.)
- Courage.
Be self-confident, optimistic and persevere against adversity.
(Sociopaths often are over-confident.)
- Justice.
Be respectful, responsible and honest. Treat others the way you want others to treat you.
(Sociopaths are very unethical.)
- Wisdom.
Learn from your mistakes; admit when you are ignorant; keep questioning.
(Sociopaths fail to learn from their mistakes; hence keep breaking the same laws.)  |
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Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/12/2009 : 11:00:13
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DEPRESSION AND THE "10 GOLDEN RULES" FOR LIVING A BETTER LIFE
Major Depressive Disorder is the leading cause of disability (ages 15-44) in the developed world. In many ways, Major Depressive Disorder is the mirror opposite of sociopathy.
Sociopaths care only about themselves, and believe they are entitled to special treatment. In contrast, severely depressed individuals anguish over the pain they have caused others, and believe that they are a burden on society.
Sociopaths enjoy manipulating people and leading others to destruction. Whereas, severely depressed individuals lose their courage and ability to lead others. Tragically, severely depressed individuals often become overly dependent and easy prey for sociopaths.
How Would A Severely Depressed Individual Score On The "10 Golden Rules"?
- Kindness.
Be kind, understanding and friendly.
(Severely depressed individuals can still show love, empathy and friendship.)
- Cooperation.
Be cooperative, generous and humble.
(Severely depressed individuals can still be generous, cooperative and humble.)
- Forgiveness.
Show forgiveness, trust, and gratitude.
(Severely depressed individuals can still show forgiveness, trust, and gratitude.)
- Leadship.
Show moral leadership, peacemaking, and independence.
(Severely depressed individuals find it very difficult to show leadership, assertiveness, peacemaking, and independence.)
- Planning.
Plan ahead; show caution; don't be impulsive, reckless or promiscuous.
(Severely depressed individuals often dwell excessively on past regrets and future fears. They usually are cautious, and their loss of libido prevents them from being promiscuous.)
- Order.
Fight chaos. Live a life of stability, purpose, and beauty.
(Severely depressed individuals lose purpose and beauty in their life, as their emotional and social life becomes more dysfunctional.)
- Moderation.
Avoid excesses; keep work-love-play in balance; compromise; live within your means.
(Severely depressed individuals show self-restraint, compromise, and live within their means. However, as their depression worsens, they eventually can't work, love, or play.)
- Courage.
Be self-confident, optimistic and persevere against adversity.
(Severely depressed individuals lose courage, hope, and give up too quickly when facing adversity.)
- Justice.
Be respectful, responsible and honest. Treat others the way you want others to treat you.
(Severely depressed individuals are still ethical.)
- Wisdom.
Learn from your mistakes, admit when you are ignorant, keep questioning.
(Severely depressed individuals still seek wisdom.) Is Something Broken In Severe Depression?
I would argue that the brain has circuits that give individuals motivation and cognitive abilities to organize their lives (and the lives of others). When this executive functioning breaks down (for psychololgical or biological reasons), individuals become depressed and less able to organize their own lives (and the lives of others).
Thus severe depression causes crippling disorganization in internal routines (e.g., sleep, energy, appetite), and well as in external routines (e.g., friendship and leadership). Eventually, severe depression can result in total dysfunction. Fortunately, there are effective treatments for severe depression.
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15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/12/2009 : 19:03:40
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Many Behaviors Are Self-Defeating
WHAT ARE THE RULES FOR LIVING A WORSE LIFE?
I believe that, if you reverse the "10 Golden Rules For Living a Better Life", you then have "rules" for living a worse life.
10 Self-Defeating Rules For Living A Worse Life
- Lack Kindness.
Be cold, uncaring or distant.
- Lack Cooperation.
Be uncooperative, selfish, or arrogant.
- Lack Forgiveness.
Bear grudges, mistrust others, or feel victimized.
- Don't Lead.
Be submissive, flee conflict, or fear abandonment.
- Lack Planning.
Live just for today; be impulsive, reckless, or promiscuous.
- Lack Order.
Go from crisis to crisis; lack stability, purpose and beauty in your life.
- Lack Moderation.
Show little self-restraint; be excessive; lack balance between work-love-play; be stubborn; or live beyond your means.
- Lack Courage.
Lack self-confidence; be pessimistic; or give up too quickly when facing adversity.
- Lack Justice.
Be disrespectful, irresponsible or dishonest.
- Lack Wisdom.
Repeat past mistakes; hide your own ignorance; or question nothing.
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15007 Posts
Gratitude: 3353
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Posted - 12/12/2009 : 22:04:54
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SELF-DEFEATING RULE #1 FOR A WORSE LIFE: LACK KINDNESS
Be cold, uncaring or distant.
Today:
- Did I lack compassion, kindness or affection?
- Was I callous or insensitive to other people’s feelings?
- Did I prefer to be alone, or not enjoy the company of others?
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10 Golden Rules For A Better Life (Lecture)
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