| Author |
 Topic  |
| davidt
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
86214 Posts
Gratitude: 31682
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 Posted - 09/19/2016 : 14:09:14
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A Superb image 0f you both Charne...
Thank you for sharing it with us!
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch,
a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment,
or the smallest act of caring,
all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
-Leo Buscaglia, author (1924-1998) |
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| davidt
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
86214 Posts
Gratitude: 31682
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Posted - 09/19/2016 : 16:11:39
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Looking back in the archives if you wish
t do so...
You will observe I frequently intimated
that your life
would take a turn for the better.
Instinct informed me so.
I am delighted I was eventually proved right.
Not so much to say I told you so...
much more to do with what I firmly believed in
as a fact as opposed to make believe...
by that I mean just saying so for effect.
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch,
a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment,
or the smallest act of caring,
all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
-Leo Buscaglia, author (1924-1998) |
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| AquaticSoul
Super Member (250+ posts)
816 Posts
Gratitude: 977
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Posted - 09/20/2016 : 02:01:53
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thank you for the input David
Yes I know you have said so time and again.
I have put in an enormous amount of hard work on myself.
There are certain things that I am comfortable with and other things that I am ok with to say no. I am in a calmer place - that being said, I still have challenges I face but I manage them better than I used to.
There are going to be days when I'll feel I can't take any more than what I am dealing with, but then again, it's only but a natural human reaction. The key is to not destroy myself in the process. I've built a base of respect for myself |
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| davidt
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
86214 Posts
Gratitude: 31682
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Posted - 09/21/2016 : 10:43:50
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"I've built a base of respect for myself"
Good News Indeed Charne..
There is nothing like love
to provide the impetus necessary
to move on!
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch,
a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment,
or the smallest act of caring,
all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
-Leo Buscaglia, author (1924-1998) |
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| AquaticSoul
Super Member (250+ posts)
816 Posts
Gratitude: 977
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Posted - 09/22/2016 : 01:02:19
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love the butterfly..i feel like one today  |
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| davidt
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
86214 Posts
Gratitude: 31682
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Posted - 09/23/2016 : 13:52:29
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Splendid News
to be made aware of Charne!
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch,
a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment,
or the smallest act of caring,
all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
-Leo Buscaglia, author (1924-1998) |
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| davidt
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
86214 Posts
Gratitude: 31682
|
Posted - 10/01/2016 : 05:38:08
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I trust everything is continuing
to go well for you and your boyfriend Charne
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch,
a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment,
or the smallest act of caring,
all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
-Leo Buscaglia, author (1924-1998) |
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| AquaticSoul
Super Member (250+ posts)
816 Posts
Gratitude: 977
|
Posted - 10/03/2016 : 08:05:49
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a month and a week on into this relationship...
It's beautiful but messy.
The man I love struggles with alcoholism and addiction (gambling/narcotics)
He never used to be like this. As I have known him for three years, the past 5 months of his life had spiralled out of control because of his divorce, struggles with emotions and dealing with not seeing his children.
I have not given up on him and try to help him fight the battle.
I have suggested today that he considers AA meetings (there's one once a week a block from where I live.)
I'm scared that his ex wife will bar him from seeing his kids ever again. It breaks my heart to see him struggle so much. But he is strong, he's a fighter. He is passionate. There are good days and there are bad days.
So that's the real full story.
I guess the reality of my life is that I've been sent here to be there for other people, as I am not sure that I will necessarily experience the same. Perhaps if he gets better things will improve again... Like I said, he doesn't have a life time issue of the afore-mentioned issues. He has always been stable and hoping and praying that this is but a blip on the radar. Some days I am scared that he won't wake up again. I am scared that his heart won't keep up with the consumption. I try to smile every day and keep on shining a light when he can't see his own.
People think i'm foolish. So be it, I am not ready to give up on someone who has such a beautiful soul and so much to give. |
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| davidt
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
86214 Posts
Gratitude: 31682
|
Posted - 10/03/2016 : 15:33:41
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Thank you for this further positive revelation...
I say postive for it is nice to know each others faults
and not allow then to get in the way of a loving relationship.
Providing one or both make the effort to get better,
as a result of possibly previously not wanting to do
anything about whatever the problem may be...
in denial is what I am getting at.
I cannot help but add that it is possible that true love alone
will conquer such addictions and that professional or self help
methods such as AA, GA., are there to provide.
What I am trying to get at is that such addictions manifest them
over a longer period of time... to deactivate same, usually means
treatment outside of the intimate relationship...
objectivity as opposed to subjectivity,to get well and stay well.
Just my point of view as ever Charne!
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| davidt
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
86214 Posts
Gratitude: 31682
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Posted - 10/03/2016 : 16:04:44
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...And So Do You As A Couple In Love!
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch,
a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment,
or the smallest act of caring,
all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
-Leo Buscaglia, author (1924-1998) |
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| davidt
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
86214 Posts
Gratitude: 31682
|
Posted - 10/03/2016 : 16:08:11
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...that goes for everyone...
in what ever relationship they are in...
that matters!
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch,
a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment,
or the smallest act of caring,
all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
-Leo Buscaglia, author (1924-1998) |
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| AquaticSoul
Super Member (250+ posts)
816 Posts
Gratitude: 977
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Posted - 10/04/2016 : 01:01:03
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Hi
Yes, agreed.
His brother went around to his place yesterday and something happened/fight of some sorts I don't know.
he called me in a state and I rushed over and just held him until he fell asleep.
I am trying to get hold of him this morning but no answer. I spoke to his brother on Whatsapp who was very jovial and pleasant and supportive.
I hope things can be conquered. I really do. He is not in denial though, he is very much aware of the problems.
He got rid of the bad influences around him yesterday, i.e. friends who were dragging him down. But he did end up drinking more.
I hope today he can start weening off the alcohol. Somehow. He said he's done it before, he'll do it again.
I'm just going to keep on fighting for him - he truly is such a beautiful soul and it's the sadness and conflict within him that he is struggling with.
Thank you for your valuable input, I really appreciate the support. I don't have much as it is at the moment because I haven't told anyone else about the predicament.
Only his family knows. |
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| davidt
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
86214 Posts
Gratitude: 31682
|
Posted - 10/04/2016 : 14:05:33
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I note what you say and trust fervently
that love, in combination with therapy finds away forward Charne!
Thinking of you as ever and especially at what I consider
a 'precarious' episode, hopefully short lived, David x
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch,
a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment,
or the smallest act of caring,
all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
-Leo Buscaglia, author (1924-1998) |
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| AquaticSoul
Super Member (250+ posts)
816 Posts
Gratitude: 977
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Posted - 10/05/2016 : 00:12:46
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Morning David
He spent the day sleeping yesterday and was sober..until his brother came around in the afternoon. I could tell when he called me last night that some drinks were had.
On the plus side, no other substance or rushing to casinos happened. Got to take that into account.
One day at a time.
For now, I am focusing on gym and work to keep me distracted and not get sucked into it all. I briefly spoke to his brother on whatsapp yesterday - I understand he is trying to help but I think the approach is perhaps too strong by trying to show him that he can do much more and that he should give up...which is silly in my opinion. It'll destroy them both (his brother is a recovering alcoholic etc)
anyway, let's keep hoping and fighting |
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| hercules21
Incredible Member (2000+ posts)
5803 Posts
Gratitude: 2829
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Posted - 10/06/2016 : 02:59:03
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wait I am lost is the brother drinking with him or not drinking with him.
Either way get him into AA or threaten to walk away from him. And mean it.
Be cruel to be kind both to him and to you.
"Mrs Morel always said the after-life would hold nothing in store for her husband: he rose from the lower world into purgatory, when he came home from pit, and passed into heaven in the Palmerston Arms.". |
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LOVE
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